My name may be Eliza D. or it may not be that at all. But that is besides the point. The point is: I like blogging as much as I like dark chocolate, because they are both rich in antioxidants.
I’m not here to share interesting stories about my bowel movement or daily dosage of some drug to control neurotic behavior. I will not blame bottled up resentment for my overbearing mother when I act like a psycho bitch. And I certainly will not use big words that half of the population cannot even understand from the context to make myself feel better about being an ordinary human, while thinking I am smarter than 99% of the people I meet. But just to get it out of the way, let me tell you that I do have amazing bowel movement, I am neurotic, I have an overbearing mother, and I am smarter than 99.99% of the population. Also, I am a psycho bitch, but I don’t take drugs to control that. I think my beauty comes from within where the psycho bitch originates.
I wish I could say that this is a blog about a 20-something year-old misinterpreted girl, but I would be lying, because I am almost 30, so that would only hold true for another couple of months. I won’t tell you when I turn 30, but just know that it will be here sometime this year.
I am an average woman with average needs. I love ice cream, I love men, I love sex, and as we all know by now, I love dark chocolate. This blog will be an average concoction of stories about these average things and their role in my life. Let’s hope there are more stories about sex than about ice cream.